


The Things We Do At Night

by thesnowyswan



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Affair Era 2.0, Background Aaron/Alex, M/M, Spoilers, but it's not really a thing, eastieoaks spoilers, sex with the ex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-07
Updated: 2017-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-11 18:16:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12940947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesnowyswan/pseuds/thesnowyswan
Summary: Written for BAWeek Day 4 ‘I’ll Make Love to You’. It’s Aaron’s birthday and he doesn’t appreciate Robert’s interference.





	The Things We Do At Night

 

26.

It’s not what he thought it’d be, but it’s not bad by any standard. The simple happy birthday banners hung around the Mill are a nice touch. Aaron smiles as he’s handed a glass of prosecco.

In fact, what he actually appreciates when he looks around is that it’s simple. It’s quiet. It’s just all Aaron’s favourite people (bar one) gathered to celebrate his birthday. It’s _exactly_ what he wanted. His gut churns. Alex doesn’t know him that well, Liv could have helped him, the way she’s smiling and chucking peanuts up to catch them, she likes Alex.

But _this_.

“Gerry,” He collars the teen when he passes him.

“Yeah?”

“Did you help set this up?”

“The banners and stuff? Yeah!” His puppyish glee is normally something that Aaron can roll his eyes at, but his heart is pounding with unanswered questions. Gerry catches his look, “But you meant did we stick our noses—”

“ _Gerry_.”

Gerry looks down like he doesn’t know what to say. He’s been in cohorts with Liv for months, he’s got her back and Aaron on some level feels a sense of pride because of it, but he grips his fingers tighter and Gerry caves under the pressure.

“I saw him talking to Robert earlier. I dunno what was said.”

Inside, he’s shaking. Outside, he’s smiling and not one of them can tell the difference.

*

Alex has an early shift, so he’s gone home rather than wake Aaron up after a heavy night of drinking — he’s only had one glass that he carried around, full, so no one thought to give him another — and the kids went up after a shoddy clean up job and Aaron shaking his head in despair.

He can’t focus. He’s tipping sausage rolls into a container and he can’t untangle or calm his thoughts. _Robert, Robert, Robert_. It’s a loop that never ends and he can’t shut it down. He grunts in frustration as he slams the lid down and leans his forehead on the upper cabinet. He slips his phone out of his pocket, ignorant of the time and sends one text: **come over**.

*

He already knows what he’s gonna do. He’s reconciled to it. He’s berated himself, condemned himself and everything in between. He can’t not do it, not today, he can’t deny the heavy feeling in his chest that will not go away and how it eases when he opens the door, Robert’s outline clear in the glass.

“You alright?”

“Shut up.” Aaron pushes Robert back against it. He looks confused, unaware of what might have incurred Aaron’s wrath, but he doesn’t deny it and it makes Aaron worse.

“Why’d you help him?”

“Help? Aaron—” Robert smartly shuts his mouth and Aaron jabs his index into his chest again.

“Tell me why.” His accent is thick on the why. His emotions are all over the place and Robert is raising his hands up like he’s trying to calm a startled animal.

“I wanted you to have a good birthday.” Robert encircles Aaron’s wrist with his hand, and it’s cold from where he’s been outside, then he slowly takes it down to where it hangs loosely in his hand between them. “We’re friends, aren’t we?”

 _We’re not friends. We were never friends._ Aaron feels his blood coursing through his veins and he won’t be placated. “Don’t help him.”

“Okay.”

“I mean it. Stop meddling.”

Robert doesn’t even try to deny or say anything to the contrary and some part of Aaron’s hindbrain knows that he didn’t mean anything by it, but his heart, his honest heart, only feels pain.

“I don’t want to do this.” Aaron tells him quietly. Robert lets his wrist go and he knows he’s come across all wrong. Robert doesn’t have a clue what Aaron has decided. What has been weighing on him for so long and is only now breaking with this one act of kindness from Robert. His mouth is slack and unaware when Aaron cups his cheeks in his hands and places his lips over Robert’s. His kiss is tender and entirely hesitant, but Robert’s mouth immediately works under his, kissing him back with barely there pressure and trembling lips like he’s expecting it to be taken away from him. Except he’s the one who pulls away.

“Aaron, what are you doing?”

“Upstairs.”

It’s blatant. It has no other meaning between them; come upstairs, take off your clothes, lay your body on mine.

Aaron doesn’t look back as he walks up, his feet padding softly and for a second he doesn’t hear anything and he thinks he’s made a terrible mistake, but he realises Robert has taken his shoes off too and is holding them in his hand. He puts them by the door to Aaron’s room before closing and locking it.

“We shouldn’t do this,” Robert tells him as he takes off his jacket.

Aaron pulls off his jumper and t-shirt in one swoop, “I know.”

Robert’s shirt takes a little more time and Aaron holds his waist as Robert frees more freckled skin to his view. The shirt hangs in tails when Robert touches one of his hands, “Why are you doing this?”

Aaron unbuckles his belt, “You know why.”

 _I love you. You told the man I’m dating how to treat me well. I love you. You did it solely for me and no one else. I love you. I love you. I love you_.

He can feel the soft hairs on Robert’s belly as he unbuttons his jeans and unzips the teeth. Robert does the same for him and pushes the denim off his hips before walking him back to the bed. He hits the back of his knees and drops down with a short bounce. Robert goes to follow him, but Aaron holds his hips, peels down his underwear and presses his nose against Robert’s groin. It’s all heat and musk, just like he remembers, and it tastes hot under his tongue when he flicks it out for a momentary lick.

“Aaron.” It’s soft, to get his attention, so he looks up, Robert leans down to give him a kiss and smooth a hand up and down his back. He keeps his eyes up when Robert straightens out. He isn’t hiding from this. His mouth, on the other hand, fills up with saliva right before he gets his lips around Robert’s dick, and he uses it, uses his want to wet the head and suck him down until Robert’s grabbing Aaron’s hair and digging his fingers into his shoulders. He feels a two finger tap on his skin, Robert’s sign that he’s close and he can’t stop the low whines spilling out of his mouth long enough to say it.

His lips feel puffy when Robert smooths a thumb over them, it’s worse, or better? He doesn’t know, when he kisses him again, leaning down and forcing Aaron to go with him until they’re shifting up the bed. Aaron ends up laying on his pillows with Robert’s hands and knees either side of him, their mouths still glued together. He pulls away with a short breath, trying to pull deeper lungfuls in, but he’s too consumed by Robert to really get anything in.

“You can still stop, you know.” Robert tells him as his fingers skate the edge of his waistband where it awkwardly sits on his thighs. Aaron hooks his fingers under it and pulls it and his jeans off, shoving them down his legs and off his ankles, scrunching them into a ball to throw into the corner.

“I want you.” _I always want you_.

Robert’s face softens as he helps Aaron shimmy his own clothes off before he lays down between Aaron’s thighs. “I missed you.” he tells Aaron with a sad sort of desperation and Aaron pulls him up for a kiss that hopefully pours into him how much _he_ missed him. How he has longed for this despite everything. Robert pulls away abruptly, and Aaron is left hanging as he is put on display for his ex-husband’s gaze. He’s open and unabashed in his want. _He’s never seen anything better, he’s never wanted anything more_ , and Aaron can hear it all in the silence. He still has to fight through it though. He tries to push the focus off him by pulling at Robert’s arms, only Robert sits on his thighs and encourages him to take the inaudible praise instead: “You’re so beautiful, Aaron.”

He never accepts this kind of admiration unless it’s Robert. Unless it’s here between them. He doesn’t have any words for it, how everything just bottles up in a swelling balloon of emotion that presses from his insides, out. He just _can’t_ , but Robert understands that. Understands him. So, he takes Aaron’s hands, laces their fingers together and squeezes them gently until Aaron looks up at him again.

Robert lets Aaron wrap his arms around his back while Robert holds his face, thumbs tender on his beard. It’s a soft moment, lips brushing lips, gentle kiss sounds in the otherwise silent room that are completely at odds with their nakedness, but their desire for each other has always been constant and unavoidable, so when Robert’s hands dance across Aaron’s skin, he feels it everywhere, in his bones, his head, his heart.

Aaron fumbles in his drawer for what he needs and leaves it by his side, Robert doesn’t let him go too far, his face tucked up in Aaron’s neck with wet kisses and heavy strokes of his hand on his cock as they lay back down. He pushes at Robert’s bicep and he nods in acknowledgement but is more intent on kissing him again, his tongue pressing inside Aaron’s mouth while his hands work between them, touching, stroking, massaging. His fingers are cold with lubricant when Aaron folds up his knee so that Robert can slip them inside him, and he flexes his toes to distract himself as it warms up with Robert’s focus. He takes his time, curls his fingers forward when he gently twists them inside and Aaron bites his lip and keeps his eyes on the ceiling.

“Aaron.” It’s quiet. _Come back to me_.

He breathes heavily as Robert keeps working his body, his hands dig in a little at Robert’s waist as he swings his knees out and in. Anything to help manage the slow slither of heat that builds in his belly.

“Just a little longer,” Robert tells him as he kisses his collarbone gently.

Aaron wants to roll away from it, how it all feels, how intent Robert is on his pleasure. He drags the duvet under his fingers like the sensation of it might make it less so, but Robert brings him back with another kiss under his jaw as he slips his fingers out. It’s a moment when he rolls down the condom but not long before he’s lining himself up against Aaron, his hands either side of Aaron’s chest as he lets the weight of his body ease him down and in. It’s always rough, those first few seconds, but after so long, Aaron feels like he’s drowning in it, that contrasting push/pull of his instincts until his want overrides them all and has him biting his lip and breathing shallowly as his eyes flick down to their hips and back up to Robert’s face. It’s never less between them. Time and distance has done nothing to dull their edges.

Finally, Robert seats himself inside Aaron’s body before he folds himself down on his elbows, their bellies and chests hairbreadth apart and he’s breathing on Aaron’s chin. He barely moves, so when he does, it sends little waves of pleasure to that same coil of heat that Robert started with his fingers. Aaron looks up into Robert’s eyes where he’s so close, catching the flecks of blue in the green of his eyes, the very faint gold around his iris. He leans up the short distance to kiss Robert’s lips and takes his breath into his mouth as he breathes into the space between them.

Slowly, his orgasm builds, quietly, unassumingly as they rock together. Robert doesn’t let him get a hand between them, instead he does it, watching Aaron go back to clutching at the bedsheets as his knees fall apart and come back tighter at Robert’s sides. It isn’t an explosive orgasm, more like it leaks out of him, heat spreading like getting into a warm bath and wetting his stomach as he pants softly and licks his lips. Robert lets him calm down before he gently turns him over and lines himself over Aaron’s back, pushing back inside him and rolling his hips against Aaron’s bum. It forces Aaron’s groin into the bed and he’s fighting his own sensitivity as he shudders every time the head of his dick catches on the duvet. His mouth is open, his voice half cut moans as every thrust is another jolt of _too much_. He grits his teeth as he tries to cope, Robert strokes his side to try and comfort him, but he just ends up smooshing the side of his face into the pillow, his fingers turning into claws as he drags the duvet under himself.

Robert noses at his hair line and gives him a succession of quick kisses on his neck as he murmurs softly, “You’ve got it, you’re doing so well.”

He catches Aaron’s prostate when he starts thrusting properly and it pushes Aaron to a mostly dry second orgasm that wracks his whole body with shivery tingles and whites out his vision while pushing out the last dribble of come from his previous orgasm. Aaron blinks himself back into his body, his focus now is to reach back and grab Rob’s arse so that when he comes, he doesn’t thrust anymore, just drives himself as deeply inside Aaron as he can, to make sure that Aaron can feel the heat of him when he twitches with aftershocks. Which he does, his arms wobbling as he tries to hold himself up.

When he’s done, Robert eases out and ties off the condom, dropping it off the side of the bed. Aaron just lays there on his stomach, appreciating how it all feels; thick, warm and satisfying. Robert’s drawing random circles on his shoulders to keep them touching and Aaron turns his head so that he’s watching him with sleepy eyes. He remembers the times when he liked to keep Robert inside, let him shake and moan softly until he was completely limp, but today he’s grateful that Robert didn’t let him. He’s raw and emotional and he feels it pinprick behind his eyes. Robert can’t stay, they both know it.

“Happy birthday.” Robert whispers as he kisses Aaron’s shoulder.

Aaron wipes his eyes, “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, no.” Robert pulls his hand away and smiles at his red rimmed eyes, “I’m happy I got to spend time with you.”

 _And I used you_.

“We’re not in a good place.” Aaron admits and Robert nods.

“I know.”

He can’t say _it_ , he can’t cross that boundary because there’s no going back, but it hangs heavy in the air between them.

“I’m still—” _with Alex_.

“Aaron, I know.”

His returning silence after that is just as heavy.

Stupidly, he pulls the duvet right down and back over them both, sliding so that he can lay on Robert’s chest. Robert puts his arm around him and cuddles him in close and Aaron lets himself fall asleep to the familiar thump thump of his heart.

He isn’t there when Aaron wakes up.

He has two texts on his phone; the first is **how’s ur 1 st day as a 26 yr old? **It’s quick and on the go, Alex still managing to think about Aaron while he’s out saving lives. He feels like utter shit.

The second is **don’t beat yourself up. You made a mistake. It’s easy done**.

Except Robert isn’t a mistake. He’s never a mistake, and that’s what always rips him open and leaves him to bleed.

He only sends one text back.

 **I love you**.

Maybe they’re not together, but they’re not a mistake.


End file.
